CONGRATULATIONS: OUR DAY IS HERE!

GreatAspirations

FROM UNIVERSAL PRESS SYNDICATE
FOR RELEASE: WEEK OF JUNE 14, 1998
GREAT ASPIRATIONS! By Two Dads
CONGRATULATIONS: OUR DAY IS HERE!

Father's Day is a great day! It's our day! Santa has Christmas, Tom Turkey has Thanksgiving, the Bunny has Easter, Washington and Lincoln have President's Day, Cupid has Valentine's Day. And of course, moms have Mother's Day. All the greats in history have their own day, and dads are no different.

You know, recognizing fathers is not a new phenomenon. We even celebrate Father Time when we celebrate New Year's Day, and on the Fourth of July we commemorate our founding fathers.

Let's not forget that paternal types come in a wide range of varieties. There are not only dads, but also some wonderful stepdads, and the grandest of all, grandfathers. Before we break out the party hats, however, we all need to step back and reflect on our roles as dads.

What promises did you make to yourself when you were standing in the hospital looking at your newborn through the nursery window? What New Year's resolutions have you made? What vows have you made to your parents, spouse, children, friends? Which have you kept? Which have you let slide? Father's Day is the day to start to renew them!

The exciting news is that dads everywhere always have the power to improve. Our children have a never-ending ability to forgive and forget and to love us. There can be no greater motivation for dads than the unconditional love our children give us.

As we celebrate Father's Day '98, here are three strategies to make this year ever more meaningful.

-- Be Available. Children cannot connect with someone who is not there. Research indicates that the average father spends only 10 minutes a day with his child. Who wants to be just average? Great dads realize that our children not only want us, but also really NEED us. Plain and simple, it is our job to be there. Kids can't trust and feel confident talking to someone they rarely see or connect with.

-- Be A Teacher. Get involved in your children's learning journeys. Reading, writing and even algebra are critical learning needs for children, but there are many other things your child needs to learn. And as a parent, you have the responsibility to teach them.

Sadly, it is easy to neglect our duties as teachers and expect someone else to do it. We feel that we're a "good parent" because we attend every baseball game or school open house. That's not enough. Being a great parent is getting personally involved in your child's learning. It's about playing catch in the back yard, sharing knowledge, and being a coach and teacher to your child. Behind many great people are fathers who played a significant part in their child's academic, athletic and social development.

The person who teaches your children how to accomplish that which they believe impossible creates a bond that knows no bounds. Be selfish, and don't let others take the entire teaching role.

-- Listen and Believe. Stop. Listen. Hear. Feel. Understand. If someday you want your teen-agers to talk to you about their topsy-turvy lives, then they must as children feel like you will listen, understand and really care about what they have to say.

Second, you must show faith and belief in your children. If you don't believe in their abilities and skills, then they surely won't. As dads, it's our responsibility to provide booster rockets for our children's self-esteem, self-confidence and self-image.

Celebrate this Father's Day. You've earned it. But as a great father, know that -- just like a great athlete -- you can always improve. Pledge today to make Father's Day 1999 a date when you look back and say wow, I am a better dad today than I was 12 months ago. Today, I am one step closer to being the kind of dad I vowed I would one day be.

(The Two Dads are Doug Hall, Director of Great Aspirations!, and Russ Quaglia, Child Aspirations Expert.)

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